Finding Home

Chapter I

Disclaimer: I own nothing. Not a thing. Wesley, Fred, Gunn, Cordelia, Angel and Company are all the property of Joss Whedon. I'm just messing about with them for the sole purpose of 'I can' and yet I'm in total debt to Joss and Co, for making such great characters.

Summary: (Alternate Universe) After Wesley kidnapped Connor, it was left up to Fred – a relative newcomer - to take him his belongings from the hotel. After Angel and Gunn force Fred’s hand – Wesley or Us - she leaves the hotel too. Left with no where to go, no income to speak of, Fred drags Wesley to Texas to rest and regroup while she begins the search for a new home.

Pairing: Fred/Wesley, Slight mentions of Fred/Gunn

Rating: FRAO

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“He’s not coming back here.” Angel’s usual grim features were set in a determined scowl.

“You should at least hear him out Angel.” Fred tried once more to plead with the ensouled vampire. However, her petition fell on deaf ears.

“If I see him again, I WILL kill him,” his voice was eerily calm, “and that is final!” With a flash of black, Angel was gone ending any further discussion about Wesley and what had happened.

Fred turned to Gunn, her eyes bright with unshed tears. Silently, she pleaded with the man who called himself her boyfriend to make the vampire see sense. Her hands clutching at Wesley’s notes and journals she had managed to salvage from the dumpster outside of his apartment building. She had gone over them a dozen times already, and could easily see where Wesley had been fooled to believe it was a true prophecy.

“Yo, you heard the man. Wes has made his bed, now he’s gotta lie in it.” He moved to where she stood beside Wesley’s desk, his arms circling her waist. “Now, how about you and I go do the same?” He smiled at her, taking the papers and notebooks from her hands and tossing them carelessly into the box Angel had thrown into the office earlier.

Fred shook her head, “Not now Charles,” she turned away and moved to the box, taking out Wesley’s things so they could be put back in there neatly.

He pouted and turned her back to face him, “Now is the perfect time,” he grinned lasciviously at her, “Angel’s gone out, Lorne’s probably out getting drunk, Cordelia’s away with Groo, and no more Wes to boss us around and tell us what to do.” His hands began to try and work their way under her sweater.

She couldn’t believe him! Their boss and friend was lying in a hospital bed, his throat slit from ear to ear and all Charles wanted to do was fool around. Pushing away from him, she moved to the other side of the desk. “I can’t believe this!” The papers she had taken from the box to sort out properly, now rested in an untidy pile on the desk, her hands hanging limply by her side. “Your best friend is in that hospital trying to come to terms with, not only being screwed over by Sahjahn, but, having his throat cut and Angel almost killing him, and all you can think about is the fact that now that Wesley isn’t here to nag you into doing something work related, you and I can have sex?” She shook her head. “What, did you think, because Wesley isn’t allowed back that we could all just slack off?” She looked at him, “I somehow really don’t think so Charles.”

Fred collected up the papers once again and straightened them before putting them into the box to be taken to Wesley, as per Angel’s orders. “Besides seeing as Wesley isn’t allowed back here, someone has to take his things to him and it’s not like Angel’s really all that trust worthy to be delivering this to the hospital without killing him. And, it’s not going to get there by itself.” She opened up one of the cupboards in the desk and removed the china tea service.

“Count me out. The man took Angel’s son, he knew what he was doing was wrong. Prophecy or not, he betrayed us and tried to smash Lorne’s skull in. He’s getting no sympathy from me.” Charles leant on the edge of the desk, watching her.

“So you’re all just gonna let Wes’ things collect dust until someone throws them away or he what? Takes a chance and swings by one day?” She shook her head, “I can see it now, ‘Hello, I’ve just come for my things,’” she affected a bad British accent, “‘Thank you for keeping them for me. Now, if you don’t kill me on my way back to my car, I’ll be leaving now.’ He’s not stupid Charles.” She smiled at the small group photo, hidden in one of the drawers and slid it into the box as well.

With an exasperated sigh, Gunn crossed his arms over his chest. “Look, I don’t even know why this is buggin’ you so much. The man did it to himself; he didn’t tell anyone what was going on, hell, he probably didn’t even think to make sure the damn thing was real or not.”

“It’s bugging me because, he was our boss and our friend, and the first time he makes a mistake, ya’ll are turning your backs on him. Not a single one of you has asked why he did it. And, in case you haven’t read the journals Charles, he tried to disprove it several times.” She was getting angrier by the second at the cavalier attitude Gunn had about the whole thing.

“If it matters that much to you, then you take him his things and tell him he’s not welcome back here.” He grinned inwardly as she visibly whitened. “Look, he has been messed up since the night he was stalking you through the hotel. Remember? He had an axe; he was trying to kill you? Or have you forgotten about that?” Gunn smirked at the look of horror on her face.

Slowly, however, the look of horror turned into one of fury. “How dare you!” She had to clench her hands at her sides to keep from reaching out and slapping him. “That wasn’t Wesley’s fault and you know it. Or have you forgotten that you ended up infected by Billy’s blood as well?” She gave a bitter chuckle, knowing deep in her heart, that this argument had been brewing for some time. “How quick you are to forget that YOU were the one who got in my face and threatened to beat my head in with a broken chair leg. Don’t you think that was just as scary as Wesley stalking me through the hotel?” She felt her nails cutting into the palms of her hands. “At least, I gave Wes a run for his money; I had a chance to escape him until the blood wore off. You on the other hand, locked us in a room and barricaded the door. On a scale of one to ten, I’m pretty sure you were far scarier then Wesley that night.

“And don’t even think, for a minute, that I know what you started doing, right after the ballet. Sure, I was probably wrong to think that you and I could be anymore then friends, but you were the one who refused to let me have even a moment to think of anything, or anyone else. Every time, every single time we were given something to do, you deliberately went behind Wesley’s back and either took me along for the ride, or ignored him completely. You used me Charles, you’re using me now. Using the fact that I want to make sure Wes is okay to make me do your dirty work.”

His eyes widened as she went on about how scary he’d been compared to Wesley and the fact that he was using her. “You know that ain’t true.”

“It is Charles.” Fred gave him a sad, controlled smile. “It is and you know it.”

“But I thought, you were my girl, after it all, you came to me, you didn’t go to him.”

“I went to you because you seemed willing enough to forget, while Wesley pushed me away, he was more terrified of what had happened then I was, and now, well, I don’t think it was such a good idea for us to happen. You hardly even let me work in the office anymore unless you’re here.” All the while they had been talking, she had been packing the box with Wesley’s things, her heart hammering in her chest.

Gunn’s eyes narrowed as he watched her. “Fine, have it your way. I ain’t takin’ him his things, you want him to have ‘em so badly, then you take ‘em. But don’t think that once that’s done, you can come creepin’ back into my bed.”

She looked up at him, “Don’t worry, I’m sure that won’t be happening. Besides, who’s to say I’ll even be back, except to get my stuff. I can’t… when I first decided to stay, it was because we were all like family, and then, well, people make mistakes Charles, you’ve made them, Angel’s made them, Cordelia’s made them and I’ve made them, and now that Wesley makes his first big mistake, you’re all ready to feed him to the wolves.” Shaking her head, she lifted up the box, “I’m sorry Charles, but even you knew this had to come sooner or later.”

He hefted a throwing knife in his hand and threw it at the wall on the far side of the room. “What the hell is that suppose to mean?” He glared at her, “What had to come sooner or later?”

She jumped when he threw the knife before turning on him. “This, I feel, trapped Charles, half the time you won’t let me breathe without telling you first. I can’t live like that; I can’t live knowing that, if I stay here, I’m turning my back on one of my closest friends.” Walking around the desk, she moved to the door. “I’m sorry.” She muttered once more before walking out of the hotel and out into the street.

Her heart was hammering in her chest as she hailed a cab about a block from the hotel. Positive that she was doing the right thing in walking away from Charles, and going to Wesley; of the entire group, he was the one who needed her the most right now. She cringed at the memory of the throwing knife imbedded in the wall. But, she’d had to put her foot down for once. She wasn’t the timid little thing they’d heard of in Cordelia’s vision, or the mousy little thing they’d bought back from Pylea, she was independent again. And, more importantly she didn’t need to go from one submissive life, to another. And that was exactly what had happened with Charles; she’d come back and begun to settle in and she’d turned to him because he seemed to genuinely care about her and love her, only, he’d smothered her, smothered her ability to think freely and live freely, always monopolizing her time and keeping her from doing what she’d stayed here to do.

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